Sometimes I reach the point where I want to scream “Shut the fuck up!”. It’s the eternal banal banter, over the fence chatter and very loud laughter that fills the background of my life; it’s in my office, in the kitchen, in the garden, in the car, in my face. If only I would just shut the fuck up, just for one sweet silent moment, how much calmer, saner, wiser, happier and less annoying to others would be my and their life and lives. The end of my tether is in my hand and I have had it up to here which means a new year resolution must be resolved.
“This has to stop. I firmly resolve to stop talking to my myself henceforth”
“Which means you’ll be talking to who?”
“I will make friends …apart form Molly and me…new friends…people with similar interests…people like me.”
“There are no people like you; should I say me…..not in the car at the moment….there are none but me …and yet..”
” Let me be clear with me, I have not yet given up….I’m in mid resolution….the terms and conditions of the resolution have not yet been carried ….the I’s do not yet have it….although the word is that they will”
“The I’s always have it….you make Onan seem gregarious….when I say you I mean I of course.
“There I go again…me, me, me…..please don’t fucking start singing….me, a name I call myself , far ….a long, long way to run away from my endless chatter but ….I still hear me loudly….more resolve…much more needed”
“It’s going to be a long year……”