et dieu crea la reine claude…


As I ate my five hundredth greengage of the day I began to ponder on aw and awe and concluded  how awful, meaningless and fucking annoying is the current use of awesome as a superlative particularly if Oh My God is used to preface such a declaration. Oh my god these greengages are awesome. See….it is fucking annoying. Anyway, because  greengages are so awfully addictive and toothsome they find it very hard to get from the orchard, in my case shopping basket, to the kitchen and, harsh as it may sound, they have only themselves to blame. Of all the varied members of the family plum, save for the  golden mirabelle, the greengage never fails to please and it is this impossibly seductive quality that impedes their progress from bough to kitchen to oven and in my opinion that’s how it should be….I have a feeling that god created the greengage just after he had successfully completed what has remained as the finest piece of spare rib cookery which was to be known by posterity as Brigitte Bardot….certainly a more attractive view of the garden of Eden and one could not find a more apposite symbol of irresistible sinfulness than the greengage…together with his previous creation. Having declared my love of the raw fruit it may come as some surprise that I indeed managed to preserve a few of my treasures which I put, uncooked and without any adornment or creme patissiere, into a sweet shortcrust pastry case and cooked for 30 minutes in a hot oven……and there it is in the picture below. In my heart of hearts I can’t really see why I did it….it does taste good, particularly when it’s cold and is served with thick, yellow creme fraiche….but should I have to hand a bowl of ripe fruit fresh from the bough there is little question that I would say to the snake…”I’ll have one of those, in fact as many as you can get hold of and, by the way, do you by any chance know a girl called Brigitte who I believe lives around here”.

About Food,Photography & France

Photographer and film maker living in France. After a long career in London, my wife and I have settled in the Vendee, where we run residential digital photography courses with a strong gastronomic flavour.
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33 Responses to et dieu crea la reine claude…

  1. Mad Dog says:

    I bet you’ve got the runs, after 500 greengages!

  2. Sue says:

    I am in TOTAL agreement with you regarding the unimaginative lot who awesome this and awesome that….

  3. Nadia says:

    We planted our first reine Claude last year. Should have the first crop next year hopefully.

  4. OMG!!! Looks AWEsome!!!! But how about a picture of La Bardot too? Six decades ago, she awakened in the soul of a 14 year old an interest in all things French. Vive La France.

  5. Michelle says:

    Agree about awesome. But sometimes it works … as with your tart!

  6. Eha says:

    What a gorgeous Sunday morning laugh! [Oops, another superfluous adjective methinks 🙂 !] ‘Awesome’, thank the blessed Lord, has not stuck in my ‘lazy’ vocabulary, but have at speed been guilty of ‘the other one’! Ha! Remember sitting thru’ ‘And God Created Woman’ amongst a lot of moans and groans on the distaff side of the audience . . . as a mere female failed to appreciate the excitement obviously still remembered 🙂 ! Oh those very innocent days of yore . . .! Greengages: must see whether we get them when stonefruit appears five months down the track . . . . shall remember their heavenly attributes . . .

    • I think the magic of BB was the myth rather than the flesh….she embodied the first suggestion of Pagnol’s Provencal life…and Reines Claudes have a similar luxurious sweetness:)

      • Eha says:

        Oh Roger – you are undoubtedly correct saying that in the here-and-now, but I was the only gal in an all-male industry by that time and magical ‘luxurious sweetness’ assuredly did not come into the very physical thoughts and expressions of all those next to me 🙂 !!

      • very true…..tout ca change……in the end there isn’t much luxurious sweetness in the here and now…..only in an aging man’s mind:)

  7. Sally says:

    Toothsome is a far more seductive description. Sitting here with longing and envy. All taste seems to have vanished from plums available this year.

  8. May I please still say ” Awesome”. LOL, just kidding!

    • Say it to your heart’s content, Cornelia…..I in rather a large glass house when I criticise other peoples’ vocabulary as there’s plenty of stuff in my own to which people strongly object….Oh…and I really dislike LOL…:)

  9. Bonjour Roger, I agree wholeheartedly on your two main points; gages an FD, ohlala, Brigitte😁. The rest is “new generation” talk……and (unfortunately) this language is also used by our two daughters and friends. Re BB,.long long ago I was doing a photoshoot in S. Trip and who was there by chance, the little “Goddess” of French cinema herself😉😉😉 could not stop ‘oogling’ . Youth!!!!

  10. catterel says:

    On a family stroll last week, our 2-year-old suddenly emerged from the gutter with mirabelle juice all over his face. A quick upwards glance revealed a tree almost collapsing under its load of fruit in no-man’s land … we had no compunction in helping ourselves. Nectar of the gods.

  11. Francesca says:

    Awesome fucking post. Awesome competes with ‘amazing’ as a superlative in our fair land, another one I find annoying. Lovely tart.

  12. Ok, what about “Wicked Good!” A New England phrase which is used frequently. 🙂 But it is remarkable how people, sometimes me included, get in a rut with words. Shame really.

  13. Very witty and engaging writing! Great post 🙂 I’m excited to keep updated with your blog 🙂

    xx

    https://colourpotblog.wordpress.com/

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