turning a blind eye…..

apple_in_hand_comp

The apple on the left will never be the apple of the food buyer’s eye as the apple itself has eyes. In the eyes of the buyer those eyes are the eyes that blind the punter from picking it up and paying for it. What is demanded should be immaculate…without blemish…the eyes do not have it. In a world that is so profoundly, and contrarily, maculate we dream of the unmarked, of the smooth and lissome. Lumps and bumps are part of our frail human condition which we do our best to conceal, only baring them in the madness brought on by sun or gymnasium, but we are not keen on misshapen in others, or in things, and particularly not if  they happen to be others, or things, for which we are expected to pay. The huge, smooth and unreal Kardashian arse of food is the food buyers’ dream. Shiny and smooth, but in the tones and colours that food magazine editors have conspired to tell the punters are the colours of  real food or, in the argot of the zeitgeist, “heritage”. “Heritage” can have a lump here or wart there, one or two only, in the manner of Cindy Crawford’s beauty spot, but if it has then it better also have damn good tits to make up for it, which metaphor equates to there being a current and glowing testimonial from a culinary celebrity about whose opinions we give a flying….(  you will notice that I omitted the word “fuck” out of consideration for sensitive readers. You may remember that D.H. Lawrence was never as caring with his vocabulary which is probably why he had to content himself with writing rude stories rather than being a food buyer for S&M …..very good whipped cream, apparently.)

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About Food,Photography & France

Photographer and film maker living in France. After a long career in London, my wife and I have settled in the Vendee, where we run residential digital photography courses with a strong gastronomic flavour.
This entry was posted in apples, Art photography, Bad Habits, Digital photography, food, Food and Photography, Food photographer, France, Fruit, Humour, Writing and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

46 Responses to turning a blind eye…..

  1. margaret21 says:

    Coo. Did you air-brush that apple? Of course, none of us approves, but it’s dead clever.

  2. Mad Dog says:

    So when it comes to tits, is it all in the taste?
    Those supermarkets should sell the blemished and more tasty fruit and veg with a complimentary subscription to Photoshop 😉

    • I love the idea as long as Adobe don’t get the profit..:)

      • Mad Dog says:

        They used to be very supportive of the artistic community. I’ve had a lot of software from them, along with drinks and food, but since the bean counters took over it’s all been downhill, especially the new monthly subscriptions for Photoshop CC. On the bright side the new additions have been few and far between since CS6, so there’s not much to upgrade for 😉

      • Mine is a different experience. I’ve used them as long as I’ve used digital and never received anything from them. The fact that the licence only allows one computer per sale is not good. The price is huge when compared with Capture One, which is strange as so many pros use Capture One and so many amateurs use Photoshop. I use both but am a firm fan of Photoshop…just not Adobe.

      • Mad Dog says:

        I was lucky enough to get to know some of the people working at Adobe (about 12 years ago) via their monthly Inspired Media event, where they provided an open bar, sandwiches and lots of giveaway software. At that point in time they were very keen to cultivate creativity. Sadly things changed when Adobe merged with Macromedia.
        In my experience the popularity of Capture One (I do have a copy) relates to tethered camera use and Phase One camera backs. I have heard some photographers moan about Phase One being much better five or six years ago… However, I’m not making any judgments and after years of working with and learning Photoshop I’d find it hard not to use it all the time. I looked at Lightroom when it was released and couldn’t really see the point. I also saw some less computer savvy (than me) photographers having problems overwriting files, when saving, due to confusion with the interface.
        I believe the Adobe licence allows single users to install the software on a laptop and desktop computer and that’s fairly standard with all software, not just Adobe. The thing I really object to is the new business model where you rent Photoshop on a monthly or annual basis. If you stop paying, the application stops working! At least up to CS6, when you paid it was a one off payment and you got the software forever.

      • I’m totally with you on Photoshop….Bridge and CS6 is my favourite way of editing, processing, organising and manipulation. No longer working from a studio, I rarely use tethered cameras. However, with the courses I’m running from my son’s studio the tethered option with Capture One as a processor works very well. It’s easier for beginners, that’s for sure. I never saw the point in Lightroom either. Wish I’d known about the nice Adobe people 12 years ago….come to think of it, I was already deep in the French countryside, so it wouldn’t have been much help:)

      • Mad Dog says:

        I think Lightroom and Aperture were intended for photographers who weren’t very computer literate and wanted an all in one programme for browsing and simple photo editing.
        I wish I could go back to the 80s and have a Phase One back on a Sinar 10X8 with tethering to Photoshop 😉

      • That would be and would have been totally fantastic….what a cool fantasy.

      • We can dream….it’s all I can afford:)

  3. Shiny waxed apples are a complete turn-off for me. They don’t look or smell like apples, but you’re right… Many people like it that way.

  4. Fuck the smooth and lissome.

  5. Amanda says:

    Hilarious. Very beautiful apple.

  6. It seems there is often much waste involved in beauty. Last week my son asked for a ride to the store, but as I had my dog with me, K shopped while Gibson and I strolled the parking lot and a field behind. The dumpster bin behind the store was open with the lid up and curious, I peeked – there were multiple packages of strawberries tossed because there was a bad one showing, bunches of perfect bananas that had one bruised one, many packages of other food that seemed to have nothing wrong but a loose wrapper – jalapeno peppers and bell peppers. Packages of tomatoes that looked perfectly fine but probably had some blemish here or there.

    While a consumer wouldn’t pick something blemished and the store felt they couldn’t sell it, it made me think that the large companies here that produce products have no such qualms – we eat this kind of thing all the time and don’t even think about it because it comes chopped up in a can or cooked and put in a jar, or par steamed and frozen.

    I was tempted to gather up those lost and lonely veggies and make a break for it to my car, but the stench and fear of creepy crawlies dissuaded me…

  7. An an organic eater, my apples are always like the ones on the left………..

  8. Conor Bofin says:

    Love the “Kardashian arse”. Using quotation marks is important in that sentence.

  9. Francesca says:

    That’s right. At least they aren’t yet ‘artisan’ apples or ‘bespoke’ apples. There is some research around to suggest that the ‘blemished’ apple has particular health benefits but don’t tell anyone.

  10. is there any creature more foolish, more vain than the human?

  11. Sally says:

    Wish I could buy apples that looked like the ones on the left. Sadly the ones here in are all perfect in everything but taste.

  12. Brilliant post Roger – now, if you could just photoshop the last of my blemished but delicious pears before I wrap them up/freeze them/cook them/eat them….!

    • I’m doing some pear cookery today….after I’ve dug up a whole lot of lavender bushes and moved them around the garden….repotted some box bushes…planted some bulbs….cleaned, covered and winterised the pool…then it’ll be pear time:)

  13. I guess I’m pretty fortunate to have found myself a bride then 🙂

  14. lulu says:

    Some things are meant to be ugly, i.e., heirloom tomatoes. Someone once told me the uglier the better. Unfortunately, that doesn’t work so well for us humans.

  15. I think the aesthetic demands we place on food are crazy- especially when you consider how much food we waste in complying with those demands. I’m just waiting for the food to stand up and start signing anti-airbrushing, body peace pledges.

  16. EllaDee says:

    I detest perfect unblemished supermarket fruit & veg for the same reason I detest “women’s” magazines…

  17. Karen says:

    My time has not been my own for the last month but I have spent the evening catching up on your excellent writings. Our apple orchard is planted in all heritage apples that most people have never heard of so they don’t want to buy them as they are not familiar. On top of that, we use no chemicals what so ever so our apples look like your apple on the left…and those are pretty apples compared to some. The world wants perfection and beauty is in the eye of the beholder…too bad taste is not part of the equation as some of the best may not be beautiful.

    • Your orchard sounds wonderful and must look as an orchard should. We live in a society that is completely immersed in appreciating a version of beauty that has been force fed by commercial interests….tasting good doesn’t have a look, so it’s not part of the equation.

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