The ironic combination of telephone and camera diametrically opposes the powerful principle of seeing, speaking and hearing no evil…indeed, it facilitates seeing, speaking and hearing evil. That all three of these transgressions can be done anonymously has not gone unnoticed by the twittering classes. But, as in all such contentious questions, we can rest assured that it will not be us who transgress.It’s that minority again. I wish I know where this powerful and influential minority resides, but wherever they are it’s surprising that they have gone unnoticed, because unnoticed they most certainly have gone or they would have been found and stopped.
My current relationship with the camera telephone would only enable me to speak evil to myself, which I can already do quite well and that without the aid of a telephone. Hearing evil with my telephone is harder as it rarely rings and if it does I don’t hear it because it’s tucked away somewhere safe in case one of the minority tries to steal it. Sharing evil speech with others does not come easily either, as I am still mastering the “touch screen” contacts which clumsy efforts invariably lead to yet another call for an ambulance or a fire engine.I’m reasonably sure that the French ambulance and fire services have spoken evil to me, but I haven’t heard them. I do, however, see evil. If the definition of evil includes the term bad, then every picture I take with the camera telephone is an expression of evil. For them to cease being evil I have to lead them gently to the path of righteousness through careful manipulation, although this righteousness often does not include the virtue of focus.
I persevere because I think I should, in the way that younger people go to the gym. Being that photography, of all kinds, is very much within my remit, it frustrates me that I am failing to master a reasonably simple device. It’s modernity, however, is starting to come into question. I have found that the only way that I can see the screen clearly, when outside on a hazy sunny day, is to revert to putting a black cloth over my head as was the way when I worked with a plate camera. In the picture that I have taken to demonstrate this technique, with a self timer on a camera without a telephone in it, you will notice that the Blackberry telephone camera is out of focus….it’s as though…..