Dog works in mysterious ways….

I have let sleeping dogs lie and it is for that reason that I find myself tinkling the ivories of my keyboard at this ungodly hour of the morning. Two black dogs, poodles by race,Trigger and Gypsy by name, have turned our mature household into a ménage à quatre. Very French and very tiring. The problem is that the lying dogs are the only ones sleeping. I am starting to look enviously at their cosy little, yet empty, beds that surround our own. I remember a line from Marlon Brando’s “One Eyed Jacks” in which our Marlon mumbles to Karl, of the incredibly fucked up nose, Malden that he  is “..lying faster than a dog can trot” whereas Trigger and Gypsy are “…lying fast asleep” which is much less tiring for a dog but which wouldn’t have worked for Marlon as it lacks the intended threat. Dogs, when one is not accustomed to them, change one’s routine in many ways, most of them very annoying which makes me wonder which master of irony named them man’s best friend. I have no idea what sort of psychotic friends he may have had but I assume their behaviour was so beyond the pale that he was reduced to considering beasts that lay all over his bed, often with their bums in his face, evacuated their bladders and bowels with indecent frequency in his garden and enjoyed eating his shoes,  as his “best friends”. Be that as it may, the dogs are here and we band of brothers ( and sisters), we happy band were out walking through the nearby lanes in the way that people with “best friends” do on a daily basis, come rain or shine. The dogs’ ability in keeping their sphincters closed while out walking is similar to us humans. The only fly in that ointment ( a very unpleasant metaphor in this case ) is that they are not meant to employ that control. They are meant to evacuate in the ditches which are the bathroom of voles, foxes and all things with more than two legs. The simple rule is that on leaving the house they enter their lavatory. This has not been understood by Trigger and Gypsy who when in Rome want to do as the Romans. Thus sphincters are held firmly closed until we return and they can rush through the house, into the garden, piss on the leg of my chair and shit on the gravel. “So good to be home” they mumble and rush upstairs for a lay down on the freshly made bed. Whilst I waited for our new best friends to come down for supper I took some pictures of eggs.

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About Food,Photography & France

Photographer and film maker living in France. After a long career in London, my wife and I have settled in the Vendee, where we run residential digital photography courses with a strong gastronomic flavour.
This entry was posted in Art photography, Digital photography, Dogs, Eggs, Food and Photography, Food photographer, France, Photography, photography course, Photography holiday, Poodles, Writing and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

32 Responses to Dog works in mysterious ways….

  1. Mad Dog says:

    ROFL – those eggs would go nicely with a little black truffle – maybe you could encourage the dogs in that direction 😉

  2. How does one suddenly become the partner of two adult dogs? Are they houseguests, or new residents? Best of luck with your adjustment.
    The eggs are lovely. They understand ‘Sit’ amd ‘Stay’ quite well…

  3. Ah, they have arrived. Excellent.
    Mac does this when he’s away from home. He adorns his hostess’s garden with what are generally termed ‘doggie flowers.
    Nice eggs.

  4. ChgoJohn says:

    Jerry Seinfeld told a joke that if alien beings watched city dwellers, following behind their dogs “picking up’ after them, they’d probably have a hard time distinguishing who was the master.
    Beautifully shot eggs, Roger.

  5. Tessa says:

    Lovely photos of the eggs. Don’t you just love dog sitting :)?

  6. We must be cycling in and out of the same time frame! [If that statement makes sense.] Your recalling Brando and Malden, and I am ‘re-visiting’ Tennessee Williams, ‘A Street Card Named Desire’ and Brando’s role in it. For a moment it escaped me as to why I had slipped into that time-frame. Now I know. It’s because I am reading Halberstram’s ‘The Fifities.’ However, I always feel good and nostalgic about the movies and books of that era. One of my favorite and rather forgotten movies of that time is ‘Rififi.’

  7. I laughed so much reading this being the owner of two dogs myself. Luckily ours do perform their “functions” pretty much in the correct places. I am sure your daughter knows how much you love her to be doing this for her 😉

  8. Lovely eggs. A dog is a dog.

  9. Oh please do share a picture of the beasts. Dogs can be quite trying. People who love them, like we do, think it’s worth it. But I’m not going to tell you that. When people say the same thing to us about kids, well let’s just say we’re not buying it!

  10. I was just talking about getting a dog today after seeing a chow chow. But I had very similar musings to yours, as I grew up in a house with many pets. I might wait a few years when I have more patience. But the love from a dog is best friend worthy 🙂 Wonderful photos here.

  11. Eha says:

    Can’t type, have tears dropping onto the keyboard and am trying to clap, roaring with laughter all at the same time! You do tell SUCH true tale – of absolute delight for those who have been there, and perhaps, just at the moment, are not 🙂 ! Hope you do not mind if I pass this on to some others who would understand!!

  12. Tandy says:

    Nothing beats coming home to my two dogs! At least I know every day I will be greeted with love! Stunning photo’s Roger 🙂

  13. Not housebroken? Oh, that is rough. Dogs really are wonderful companions when they’re trained. Hope the time passes quickly for you.
    Nice photo. 🙂

  14. Michelle says:

    Don’t get me started on the dogs. I’m a cat person myself. I know if I got a dog I’d quickly become one of those annoying dog lovers. So I always resist the temptation. Absolutely wonderful eggs you have there, however.

  15. ambrosiana says:

    Lovely eggs! It seems you had quite a doggy day! 🙂 funny post Roger and I agree with Rosenary, a dog is a dog!

  16. spree says:

    Roger, Gorgeous photos of the eggs and feathers, and a laugh out loud post! Our best friends respond to a specific command. When let out the back door we instruct, “all the way…go all the way!” and they head to their dumping grounds. They occasionally make moves towards the lawn (and really, who could blame them?) — we only have to inform them, “I see you!” and they sigh heavily then head to their spot. .

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